Love categorised
To digress a little the 2006 World Cup has finally come to an end, and we shall have to look forward to South Africa in 2010. For me, the current one ended on a bittersweet note. Germany, the hosts managed to come in third place, but France sundered and conceded to Italy. What a bummer. Zidane, the man everyone looked to in bringing Italy to heel, and France to victory has finally reached the end of the road, but in a truly unexpected way. What felled him wasn’t his talent, but his character. This would probably end up as a classic example on the strengths and weakness in relying on one man to rally a team to victory. A truly disappointing end, but we’re not the ones who are going to endure a lifetime’s regret for a passionate moment. Nonetheless, both the world’s best player and his team still deserved accolades for having made it so far. As for König Kahn, it’s time to call it a day too. Too bad he didn’t get to play against Italy. If he had, the former world class goalkeeper might be able to make the difference. Nevertheless it’s been a great World Cup, and it’s time to look for fresh talent.
The inspiration for this post came from a rather unusual source, an IELTS practice passage. A friend graciously loaned the IELTS practise book to me in an instant, so I decided to accept the offer. And so, I came across this rather intriguing passage that describes two psychologist’s attempts to classify the different aspects of love in a relationship.
As I as lazy to replicate the entire passage, I turned to Google first and then Wikipedia in the hopes of locating a substitute (I needed complete names, then a formal name for the theories which was not given in the original passage). As always, they produced what I’m seeking for. I can’t imagine Internet life without them, that’s for sure.
Behold the two theories.
Firstly, the triangular theory of love by psychologist Robert Sternberg that characterizes love in an interpersonal relationship on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment.
Next are the love styles, models of lovers developed by Susan Hendrick and Clyde Hendrick. They identified six basic theories that people use in their interpersonal relationships.
IMHO, I think Sternberg’s theory is more popular. Perhaps it’s because his theory is simpler to understand and easier to apply by the laypeople in characterising their relationships. The love style is admittedly more complicated, but provides a deeper insight. However, our human brains are typically attracted to the simpler option, therefore Sternberg triumph. But, as the two theories are not mutually exclusive it is a good idea to have a look at both sides.
From their studies, it was ascertained that a relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or more elements (Sternberg). On the other hand, Hendrick and Hendrick found that men tend to be more ludic, whereas women tend to be storgic and pragmatic. Mania is often the first love style teenagers’ display. Relationships based on similar love styles were found to last longer. People often look for people with the same love style as themselves for a relationship. No surprises there.
Have fun reading and trying to figure out where you fit in! 
